Sunday, July 15, 2012

The Editing Song

It depends on who you ask. Some writers love editing. Others? They hate it. Like, with the fury of ten thousand fire ants kind of hate. Me? I think I'm on the fence. Some days I love it. Others, I'd rather walk barefoot through a field of spiders. Big ones. With lots of hair. And fangs.

You see where this is going...

I'm currently in the editing cave, working on something for the Deazen series. On the days I'm not feeling the editing love, I'm easily distracted. Since today is one of those days, I thought it would be appropriate to post one of my favorite distractions, The Editing Song. I wrote this to the tune of Sublime's What I Got (because that's the song I was listening to when I wrote it--ironically when I was supposed to be editing...)


Early in the morning, risin’ from my sleep
Brew me up a strong one, and I’ll strap slippers to my feet
Got to find the plot hole, the plot hole’s killin me
Need to find the reason why my plot has gone to sea
I got an Akita, and all she does is sleep
I can spin a cliché better than any of you peeps

Well, the plot’s too thin, you better bulk it up
Cause you might get requested, so don’t get fed up
Never have to wrestle punctuation or adjectives
I always cut em down with the headaches that they give
Take a small example, a tip from me
Take all your extra words, give em up to charity
Edits are what I got
They’re within my reach
Strunk and white’s style got me writin’ like a peach
When the call comes in, gonna get what you deserve
If of course submission guidelines you observed
Edits are what I got
My brains ready to riot
You’ll know when the deadline gets hot

Edits are what I got, I said get em done
Edits are what I got, I said get em done
Edits are what I got, I said get em done
Edit’s, they’re what I got

That’s why I don’t cry when my plot runs away
I don’t get angry at the words I have to slay
I don’t get mad when my hero hits the rocks
My middle sags and dark moment sucks
Plotting and writing, it’s all the same
Crankin' out the edit’s the only way to stay sane
Let the word flow, let the word flow, come back to me

Edits are what I got, I said get em done
Edits are what I got, I said get em done
Edits are what I got, I said get em done
Edits are what I got, I got, I got

So what about you guys? Favorite distraction?


4 comments:

Ann Finkelstein said...

too funny

Ann Finkelstein said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Suzi said...

My eyes skipped down to the song lyrics before I read the paragraph saying it was Sublime. The tune jumped into my head by just reading your first few lines.

I like the song and hear it often, but that's pretty good that it popped into my head so quickly.

Love it.

Katie McGarry said...

Awesome Jus!!!!